If you have ever experienced bed rest of any kind, let me just say, I’m so sorry! It sounds so magical to anyone who needs a break (don’t we all?) but let me tell you, after day 2, it pretty much sucks.

Now if your friend is pregnant and on bed rest, it’s a whole other story. It’s pretty safe to assume that if she is put on bed rest during her pregnancy that something is not going as planned. So not only is she bored as heck and, no doubt, some things have unraveled in her home (laundry, dishes, etc.), but she is also carrying the burden of worrying extra about the sweet babe growing inside of her.

Oh, and she also can’t do anything for herself...that’s super fun too. (note the sarcasm)

Are you getting the vibe that bed rest isn’t as great as it sounds?

I was on bed rest for 5 months with my precious rainbow baby and I would not have survived with any shred of sanity if it weren’t for my tribe.  

I’m sure it is hard to know how exactly you can help someone in this situation, so here are a few suggestions to get the ball rolling.

1. Bring Food - Meals, snacks, and everything in between. If your friend has other children at home, snacks that they can easily get for themselves are a must! This will also mean grocery shopping for your friend. Don’t ask her if you can, just go do it. There are also many options online now to have people easily sign up to bring meals, like this one. Make one of those and get anyone and everyone to sign up for it. Social media is your new BFF to get the word out. Another tip would be to set a cooler outside their front door for people to be able to drop the meal and go. No awkward lingering of strangers and your friend won’t feel obligated to sit and chat with someone if she is not feeling up to it.

2. Care Packages - This can be a bright spot in her day to receive a fun filled package full of goodies. Things to include: soft blanket, fun socks or slippers, snacks, movies, candles, adult coloring book, gift cards, nail polish, journal, etc. You can personalize this to whatever your friend is into of course. Include an encouraging note and you’ve made her whole day! I had a friend even include some little things for my oldest to play with and snack on.

3. Watch Her Kids - If she has other children at home, go scoop them up for the day. Take them to your house, a park, Chick-Fil-A play place, etc. As bored as your friend is, her kids are a million times more bored and they have so much energy to burn. The best days were when someone was helping me with my oldest. It was one last thing I had to worry about and then they would go to bed like a champ at night.

4. Girls Night In - Your friend is stressed way more than she is letting on. She needs a moment of “normal” in this craziness. She might also need a moment to just cry and vent. Just be there for her. Watch a movie, eat all the food, and let her get out all the emotions she is trying to keep in check all the time. Your friend is strong, but she needs to be able to be weak too. A lighthearted distraction is very needed. 

5. Clean - Your friend is watching the chores pile up and is feeling helpless and guilty all at the same time. Just start cleaning. Do the dishes. Do the laundry. Vacuum everything. Do it all without making her feel even worse about the mess. Nothing was worse than when someone came to help but ended up making me feel bad for the mess that had piled up. If your friend says she has a preference of how her shirts are hung up, just do it. Don’t roll your eyes or make her feel like she is being picky.

You need to know, before you ever enter your friends home, that she might not be in the best mood. Not only is she dealing with regular pregnancy hormones but all the extra emotions that come with the added stress of bed rest. You being there for her truly is a selfless act that she will remember for years to come. The worst thing you can do is not do anything because you don’t know where or how to help. If you are in her close friend circle, don’t even ask to help. I had a friend come over and just tell me she was taking all of my laundry (so much laundry, you guys) home with her and that I couldn’t do anything to stop her...which I couldn’t. Haha

Are you a Mama currently on bed rest? I was told this once, “There is a time to help and there is a time to be helped. This is your time to be helped, just take it.” If you’re like me at all, it was a little painful to ask for help or even be comfortable accepting it. You don’t want to feel like a burden, and I get that, but you’re not one! You have enough going on in your life and in your head. Just let your tribe take care of you. That’s what they are there for! If you don’t know how to ask for help, just share this article on your facebook or wherever. People will take the hint. ; )